Don’t blame yourself for not getting married

Marriage Contributor
Opinion
not getting married
© Antonio Guillem | Dreamstime.com

Continued from https://today.salamweb.com/getting-married-late-do-you-know-the-right-age-for-it-episode-1/

In the last episode, some of the advantages of early marriage and some of the common disadvantages of late marriage have been discussed. In this episode, we will discuss, what problems men and women face due to not getting married. And what is the way out of it? Because once the problems are identified, it will be relatively easy to get out of them.

Depression from loneliness

Every one of the same age is married, and naturally, after marriage, everyone is busy with their families. In this case, the one who is not married becomes lonely among all. He or she doesn’t get too close to dear brother, sisters, or friends and doesn’t spend a good time. All in all, he or she becomes depressed, and from that depression comes frustration and emptiness in the mind.

Jealousy for not getting married

This is also a very common emotion. We are human beings, that can happen to us. The person closest to you may not be able to give you time like before, she is busy and happy with her family. In such a situation, it is normal for jealousy to arise in your heart. In this case, your mind and heart need to settle down with an explanation. First of all, think of the fact that you are still important in her life. And secondly, one day you will have such a life partner InshaAllah. So there is nothing to be upset about.

Not getting married related to incompetence

Every one of the same age has found their life partner, you have not been able to despite several attempts. Repeated attempts from the family are also not yielding any results. Especially in many societies, the process of meeting the bride is very insulting. After being repeatedly rejected, many began to feel unworthy. To think so means to underestimate oneself unnecessarily. Remember, just because a man doesn’t like you doesn’t mean you are incompetent. There is nothing wrong with such trivial matters. If possible, avoid the arrangement of this bride meeting. Then you will get a lot of relief.

Choosing the wrong person 

Due to constant family and social pressures, many women choose the wrong man as their life partner. The matter should not become such that the one who was found in front was married to. Many women want to comfort themselves by thinking that this is love. In order to make the family happy, many women force themselves to get married. Never make this mistake. Life is one and one wrong decision about marriage in this life will not reduce your anxiety but increase it.

Make yourself ridiculous by rushing to get married

Many women do this without knowing it. And that is, get desperate to get married. This is due to constant social and family pressure. The mind is constantly spinning, the age of marriage is passing! And with the passing of time, many become anxious for a mate. Many people turn themselves into objects of laughter and pity when they try to present themselves as brides in familiar circles.

I’m not getting married, why everybody else?

This problem is also seen in many women. When a woman is constantly harassed for not being married, anger and resentment naturally arise in her. And because of this anger and resentment, all the married people unknowingly feel like their own enemy. She became an irritable woman. To whom the happiness of no one in the world is tolerated anymore. Counseling can be very helpful to overcome this issue.

Loss of confidence

In a society where one becomes an eyesore if one does not get married at the right time and in a society where a girl’s honor and success depends on the status of her husband and family, it is normal to lose confidence if one gets married late. In this situation, many women lose confidence in themselves and gradually wrap up their lives. Don’t do this. Life is yours. And you have to live your life with your head held high.

So the advice for everyone is if marriage is in your mind, try to look for a partner from a young age. Find a worthy partner for yourself. If the marriage is not accepted by the family at a young age, explain your valid reasons to the family. And keep humbly supplicating to Allah. And in particular, you should never measure yourself by the standards of marriage or family. Measure yourself only on the basis of your own merits.