Help your child to be a positive person in life
As a concerned parent, it is never an easy task to hear your kid express negative thoughts. Similarly, to see him or her absorbed in feelings like self-doubt, sadness and anger will give you a lot of heartaches. This negativity occurs due to fear, doubt or shame… these produce stress chemicals in the brain. Thus, a negative attitude may shape the kids’ world around them.
But as we all know, children are Amana and a gift from Allah, so we must help them to develop a positive attitude about their world. But, first, we have to know what does positive behaviour really mean?
What is positive behaviour? Who is a positive person?
If a person says yes to everything, does that signifies as positive behaviour? No!
Have you ever seen your Abbu saying yes to every impulse to yours? I guess you have not. But when your little brother became addicted to smoking, it was your Abbu who talked him out of it. You have seen your Abbu accept and comply with every word our almighty Allah depicted in Qur’an. Also, you have seen him help people with their needs.
Dear reader, this is what positive behaviour looks like. Your Abbu is a positive person, and from him, you have got a positive spirit. Trust me, it is your duty now to forward positive and spiritual behaviour to your kids.
Complaining and blaming are negative attributes
Remember, there are no ‘bad’ emotions. Both positive and negative emotions are valuable to process the world around us. But, there must be a balance between both thoughts. If our kids constantly hear that we are complaining about almost everything about our Ummah, they feel strange angst among them. This angst forces them to abandon Allah and Islam, they refuse to comply with the Qur’an. Moreover, they also start complaining.
Therefore, a person who complains and blames often is not at all a positive person. But, a person who is calm headed, logical and confident can be considered in that tag.
A positive person never gives up, and always remains ready to change the ways of life in a good course. A kid who follows the positive outlook becomes the same.
A positive person takes refuge in the Quran
We should always remember that how Ibrahim fought against paganism saying, “My Lord! Surely my bones have become brittle, and grey hair has spread across my head, but I have never been disappointed in my prayer to You, my Lord! [ Qur’an 19:4]
He also asked his father, Remember˺ when he questioned his father and his people, “What are these statues to which you are so devoted?” [Qur’an 21:52]
Therefore, when the kafirs tried to kill him by setting the fire, our almighty Allah saved him. Ibrahim never lost his devotion and belief. He took refuge in Qur’an and Allah. So, when Allah instructed him to build the Kaba, he asked his son to accompany him.
This is a wonderful example of a positive father and son.
Almighty Allah depicted in the Holy Quran,
“ And mention in the Book ˹O Prophet, the story of˺ Ishmael. He was truly a man of his word and was a messenger and a prophet. He used to urge his people to pray and give alms-tax. And his Lord was well pleased with him.” [Quran 19:54,55]
Teaching our kids about Allah’s sign
Allah gives us a lot of cues in life to learn and experience positivity. We should teach our kids to observe and identify these signs. Remember, for our kids, primarily we are the world. So, try to be a wholeheartedly positive person for them.
For example, you visit a park with your daughter, and there you see a person is smoking. Immediately request that person to stop it. That is positivity. If you ignore and let your daughter play near the smoker, dear reader, you are teaching her negativity.