Ramadan rules on marriage and intimacy
Ramadan rules for Marriage
There is no provision in Islamic law that prohibits marriage during Ramadan or any other month. Rather it is permissible to get married at any time of the year.
But it is forbidden for a fasting person to eat and have sexual intercourse with his wife from Fajr to sunset. So for a person who has the power to control himself and does not fear getting involved in breaking the fast, there is no objection to getting married in the month of Ramadan.
However, a person who wants to start his married life in the month of Ramadan. But fears that he will not be able to be patient with his new wife during the day. Therefore, in order to engage in Haram activities and not violate the sanctity of this dignified month, he should get married after the month of Ramadan has passed.
Ramadan rules for associating with wife (kissing, hugging)
In Ramadan, many find the meaning of real restraint in the midst of abandoning their wives and families. But we do not get such teachings from the life of the Prophet (SAW). On the contrary, Ramadan rules show he continued to associate with his wives during Ramadan. Narrated Ayesha (R): The Prophet (SAW) used to bow his head towards me during I’tikaf. At that time I would comb her hair. He would not have entered the house without humanitarian needs.” (Muslim)
This is a sign of mutual love between husband and wife. Even while fasting, the Prophet (SAW) kissed his wives and hugged them intimately.
According to a narration, Ayesha (R) said, “The Messenger of Allah (SAW) came to me to kiss me. I said, ‘I am fasting’. He said, ‘I am also fasting.’ Then he leaned over and kissed me.” (Musnad Ahmad)
Hafsa (R) said: “The Messenger used to kiss me while I was fasting.” (Muslim)
He even hugged. Ayesha (R) said: “When the Messenger of Allah (SAW) hugged me, I said to him: ‘I am fasting’. He said, ‘I am also fasting’.” (Musnad Ahmad)
When asked about Ramadan rules associated with fasting, Ayesha (R) said, “Yes, (he used to associate), but he was the most controlling of you.” (Muslim)
From these hadiths, it is understood that if there is a danger of breaking the fast, one should not kiss the wife or have intimate intercourse with her while fasting.
Ramadan rules for sexual intercourse with wife
It is permissible to have sexual intercourse with one’s wife on the night of Ramadan. For a married man, Ramadan rules say sexual intercourse with his wife is also said to be equivalent to charity. Worshipers should be aware that Ramadan is not abstinence, but a month of moderation and worship.
The Prophet (SAW) used to meet his wives for sexual intercourse on the night of Ramadan. However, during the last ten days of I’tikaf, he used to refrain from it. Ayesha (R) said: “Not because of nightmares, but because of sexual intercourse, the Fajr of the Prophet would have taken place in Ramadan in an impure state. Then he would take a bath and fast. ” (Muslim)
However, the Prophet (SAW) used to have intercourse with his wives only during the first twenty days of Ramadan, and during the last ten days, he used to observe I’tikaf. Ayesha (R) said, “In the last ten days, the Prophet (SAW) used to abstain from sexual intercourse, stay up at night, and wake up his family.” (Bukhari)
However, it is not permissible to have sexual intercourse with one’s wife during the days of Ramadan. If one has sexual intercourse while fasting, the Qada and Kaffarah of that fast will be obligatory. The expiation of this is to observe 60 fasts at a time without any break. If one can’t afford it, then he has to feed 60 poor people twice a day.
Wet dreams while fasting
First of all, bathing will not be obligatory on a person who thinks that he has had wet dreams and then wakes up and does not see any sign of semen on his clothes.
Umm Sulaym (R) said, “O Messenger of Allah! If a woman has nightmares, will bathing be obligatory on her? He said: Yes; If water (semen) sees.” (Bukhari and Muslim)
This hadith instructs that if one does not see water (semen), then bathing is not obligatory on him.
Secondly, fasting will not be broken due to wet dreams. Because nightmares happen due to the reluctance of the fasting person.
The consensus of the scholars is that if someone has a nightmare, his fast will not be broken. Because in this case, the person is incapable. For example, if a fly flies into someone’s stomach despite someone’s reluctance, his fast will not be broken. Also, the Prophet (SAW) said, “Whoever vomits, or has nightmares, or exhales blood with horns, his fast will not be broken.”
So, if someone has nightmares, his fast will not be broken. Because nightmares happen reluctantly. In this case, only bathing will be obligatory for that person. Fasting will not be broken, and Qada and Kaffarah will not be necessary.