Who are you actually trying to please?
It is important to reflect on our mindset and way of thinking in life to ensure that the focus of who we are trying to please is correct. We will realise who we are actually trying to please when we assess our reactions and thoughts to the behaviours we receive from different people.
If we notice that we become too affected by people, whether that be our parents, spouse, grandparents, other family members, managers, or friends, it shows that we are too focused on trying to please them. We are too engrossed in trying to meet their expectations when really our main and ultimate focus should be on pleasing Allah, not any person or worldly thing.
If we are trying to please Allah’s creation, we will never be completely content. We will soon notice that we are just going through an endless cycle of trying to please the person but never finding peace. We will go through phases that are positive, in which everything is going well. We will put that person at the centre of our lives and feel that we are happy and content.
As soon as we have a disagreement with that person, or we are not managing to meet their expectations, we start to questions ourselves. We think that there is something wrong with us or that we are inadequate.
On the other hand, we may begin to think there is something wrong with them. We start to think negatively of them and wonder how they could possibly behave the way they are. We feel as though we did not anticipate this type of attitude from them and it begins to upset us.
Following this, we somehow manage to patch things up and solve our problems with that person, only to find that the next dilemma is just around the corner. There are lessons to learn from this for us all, as this is what can happen when we focus on pleasing people. This is what ultimately can happen when we focus on pleasing Allah’s creation and not Allah.
We must realise that Allah shows us when we try to please others that this is not why we were created by Him. We were not created by Allah and put on this earth to focus on meeting the expectations of other people.
When we focus on pleasing Allah, not only will we achieve success in this life, but we will also achieve success in the Hereafter. Success is not defined by what we see in society as wealth, fame, and materialistic status. Real success is in achieving the rewards of Allah.
We read in the Holy Qur’an:
“Whatever is in the heavens and earth exalts Allah, and He is the Exalted in Might, the Wise.” (Qur’an 57:1)
May Allah bless us all with the mindsets in which our ultimate aim is to please Him and not His creation. May He make us sincere believers who strive to follow the example of our beloved Prophet Muhammad (SAW).